I've been there too. After two years of gyno exams, antibiotics and chronic pain I was finally dignosed with IC (bladder). I suggest you do as much of your own research as you can and keep a log of your symptoms, diet and activities.
Misdiagnosis is an alarmingly common cause of death. Anything you can learn for yourself will really help.
Be there, done that.....and through it again! To answer your first question, finding a doctor that will listen is very hard. It took 6 years to become so lucky as to find the one that would finally listen. As a matter of fact, it was because he listened that he was able to finally give me a diagnosis. The illness I had was killing me, but no one even cared enough to listen. Even his colleagues wrote me off and told me it was in my head. So I guess you just have to keep trying until you find one. The only other way I can think of is through word of mouth. I encourage you to stick with this doctor until the very end though because if you switch before they have given up then you aren't allowing him/her to completely assess the situation. My advice is to type out a detailed description of how you feel, when you began feeling it, where you were when you began feeling it, what makes it worse or better and a personal and family health history. Throughout the day doctors can become extremely busy, that doesn't excuse them from providing the best care for each patient, but they are only human. Also if it's possible, try to get early morning appointments. That way the doctor isn't worn out and doesn't feel rushed to get through the day. Also by doing that, you just may score a little more time with the doc b/c ppl are always late for early morning appointments. Also remember that doctors practice medicine, no one doctor will have all the answers, but a good one will try to find the answer. Good luck and just try to be patient.